Stylist: How’s that?

Trumwill: Could you take a little more off the back?

Stylist: Taper it a little more, you mean?

Trumwill: Yeah. For some reason my hair seems to grow fastest in the back. When I’m not careful I am the king of the unintentional mullet.

Stylist: Hey, be glad that it’s growing at all.

Trumwill: No joke. Someday I may need it to grow super fast back there so I can cut it and plug it in up front.

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6 Responses to Conversation at Snippity-Snip

  1. Kirk says:

    It seems to be the fashion nowadays for balding men to shave everything short. A lot of them also grow a goatee, which I guess gives people some hair to look at.

    Though it’s a look that seems to work, I’ve never gone for it myself. It’s just too trendy for me. Instead, I just sweep my remaining hair straight back.

    Unfortunately though, my blonde hair is very lightweight, and sometimes likes to stick straight up. In one of my college i.d. pictures, it looks almost like I’m falling out of a plane.

    Anyway, now that you’re (still?) unemployed, you should really let your ‘stache run wild. Go for the “My Name is Earl” look, if you haven’t already. It’ll make you look different than other job applicants. Intereviewers will probably think you must be super-capable to go with such a bold look.

    And if you haven’t already, you should really write a post on having a moustache. I can’t imagine there are too many guys in IT who have them.

  2. Peter says:

    It seems to be the fashion nowadays for balding men to shave everything short. A lot of them also grow a goatee, which I guess gives people some hair to look at.

    Lately I’ve been seeing a lot of fat men with shaved heads and goatees. It’s a bad choice, the goatee part at least, because a goatee makes a fat man look even fatter by accentuating his jowls.

  3. thebastidge says:

    Lots of IT guys with facial hair. I usually have a goatee, but I go with really big handlebar moustaches every now and then just for the hell of it. When I shave my head with that, my sister tells me I look like a trucker on meth.

    RE: trimming in the back. Many years of military-style haircuts have taught me- always taper the back, never block cut. The natural tendency of most people’s hair it to grow in a V centered on the neck. A block haircut starts to get fuzzy and raggedy while a tapered haircut grows out more gracefully, so if you miss the barber for a week or two after you really should get a haircut, it’s still neater than the other way.

  4. rob says:

    Trumwill, if the hair on top and in front has recently started growing more slowly, it could be the beginning of baldness. OTOH, you’re married, so maybe it doesn’t matter.

    I’m 31 and severely balding. I’m white, really really white, so I can’t shave my head, for social reasons, and it just isn’t a good look. Very short, like under 1/8 inch, is I think my best option.

    Shaved/almost shaved tends to look better because balding men almost always look scraggly with longer hair. Kind of like a five day beard is less attractive than a full beard or clean-shaven.

    Keep in mind, I’m paranoid, delusional, and mostly live in my head, which is a polite way of saying out of touch with reality. As far I can can judge from girls and women looking at me, very short hair, clean-shaven, tan, and lean gets me the most looks. I think some aren’t ‘this guy looks really odd or scary’ Women definately get a creepy vibe from me when I have longer hair and facial hair.

    Some of the difference might be that keeping very short hair takes effort, so it shows that one is at least a bit put together. I wish I could get the whites of my eyes whitened.

    The facial hair overweight men have is called the bloatee. From urban dictionary:

    When fat people grow goatees to try to make themselves look better. As defined by Roast Beef in the comic strip Achewood: “When a dude of gravity tries to distinguish his neck from his face by arbitrarily shaping facial hair that is the bloatee”

  5. trumwill says:

    My hair has always grown more quickly in the back, so if I’m going bald I don’t think that’s a sign of it. If I do go bald, I’ll either go the rogaine route or the shaved head route. I’m worried about a shaved head, though, because I have an elevated crown. I just know that whatever I do, I’m not going to be that guy with hair in front and in back but with a bald crown (like Mike Huckabee and Bob Taft)

    I may have a bloatee myself, sometimes, depending on the weight requirement. Clancy thinks that the goatee does slim out my face.

  6. Kirk says:

    Anyone here remeber “Riff-Raff,” the guy from Rocky Horror? Worst hair for a balding man ever, but it has a certain charm.

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