In the years I have known her, my wife has never had a purse. It’s just not her way. Nor, really, does she tend to carry her wallet around with her. Her wallet is huge and bulky, and she spends a lot of time in scrub pants that are ill-equipped to carry them. Me? I feel naked without my wallet, even when it’s so overstuffed to be uncomfortable to sit down.

So she ends up carrying cash and credit cards along in her pocket. She also changes her pants a lot (she doesn’t like to wear her slacks any longer than she has to and she has to change in and out of jeans and scrubs… meanwhile I wear only one pair of pants a day, sometimes for more than one day, and sometimes to bed). She has a little bit of trouble keeping track of her credit cards. And one by one, because of this and discontinued accounts, they’ve been disappearing. Until it reached the point that the last one went missing and I had to give her mine for her flight back from Delosa. And that one did not make it all the way to Arapaho.

—-

I have a total of four cards from Bank of the Northern Hemisphere (BNH). One is a credit card and three are debit cards linked to different accounts. The problem with BNH debit cards is that they all look the same. When we opened the second account (the joint account from Estacado), I made sure that it was only a Gold account rather than a Platinum so that the card would look different. This until we got to Arapaho and opened another account. We got the Platinum card. The main way I could really tell the difference between my personal account and the Arapaho account was the due date.

One of them expired last month. I got a new one and lo and behold, they changed the design. This was awesome! Except for the fact that Clancy had lost my other card and I had to get that replaced. Meaning I now had the same design on two cards. Not only that, but the same expiration date. So now I have to start memorizing numbers. At least until I order a specialty card or something.

Meanwhile, I fished up all of the replacement cards that BNH had been sending her. I even found one that matched a separate letter with a PIN number on it. So she has her own card. And another card without a PIN. And the BNH credit card that may or may not be activated. I activated my replacement card, which may have activated hers because it won’t let me activate hers without speaking to a representative, and I don’t do a good Clancy impersonation.

—-

Because of the credit/debit card turnover, one by one our monthly subscriptions have been notifying me of a possible discontinuation/disconnect if I don’t put in a new credit card. Satellite. Rhapsody. CBS All-Access.

I’ve never been good at keeping track of my usernames and passwords. So every day has been a matter of checking all of my email boxes to make sure I don’t get a pending disconnect notice.


Category: Market

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6 Responses to Plastic

  1. ScarletKnight says:

    At times I wonder if it would be a good idea if there should be a test required before one could legally be declared an adult.

    I feel naked without my wallet, even when it’s so overstuffed to be uncomfortable to sit down.

    Really? Or did you steal this from George Costanza?

    As for wallets, I only carry one so I have something to give to a mugger.

    I have a total of four cards from Bank of the Northern Hemisphere (BNH).

    My imaginary bank would be the Bank of the Western Hemisphere, if only to keep timezones down.

    it won’t let me activate hers without speaking to a representative, and I don’t do a good Clancy impersonation.

    In real life does Clancy have a man’s name, or a woman’s?

    This remind me, my mother would bitch and moan whenever I asked to borrow her credit card in college. Instead of just saying she didn’t trust me or was cheap or whatever the reason was, she said it was because the sales clerk would notice that the credit card belonged to a woman. Of course not once did the sales clerk care who’s name was on the card. IRL I don’t even sign the back of my credit cards; this has caused a minor inconvenience exactly twice.

    I’ve never been good at keeping track of my usernames and passwords.

    IT people have no concept of the drawbacks and limitations of human memory.

  2. trumwill says:

    At times I wonder if it would be a good idea if there should be a test required before one could legally be declared an adult.

    I know I can always count on you for a sympathetic ear… 🙂

    Really? Or did you steal this from George Costanza?

    Really. I’d forgotten that Costanza ever said that.

    As for wallets, I only carry one so I have something to give to a mugger.

    There was a time I kept an empty wallet back when I was in Estacado so that I could show people who bugged me outside the gas stations that I was broke.

    My imaginary bank would be the Bank of the Western Hemisphere, if only to keep timezones down.

    I actually ripped the BNH name off a series of humorous radio ads for Compass Bank.

    In real life does Clancy have a man’s name, or a woman’s?

    Technically both, but it’s more associated with females. But the bank presumably knows she’s female.

    IT people have no concept of the drawbacks and limitations of human memory.

    I actually agree with this. One of these days I am going to come up with a system.

  3. ScarletKnight says:

    I know I can always count on you for a sympathetic ear… 🙂

    Well come on now, you have to admit that sometimes your relationship with certain institutions can seem like a 19 year old who failed the GED. If that’s what you really were, then I wouldn’t make fun. The fact that you and your wife are much much brighter than that makes the incongruity funny.

    I’d forgotten that Costanza ever said that.

    Well the episode in question is 912: The Reverse Peephole. George’s wallet is so famous that it has its own Facebook page.

    Technically both, but it’s more associated with females. But the bank presumably knows she’s female.

    I have been on the phone with the phone and cable companies pretending to be dead male relatives more times than i care to admit. Why do I do this? Because the widows in question never switched the accounts to the their own names. So I had to pretend to be Sam Knight or Ted Knight or whomever.

  4. Sheila Tone says:

    ScarletKnight has a point. This post makes me nervous on your financial behalf. I’m not naturally any better than you are, but my spouse is extremely well-organized and financially savvy. Of the two of you, I’d expect you to be the financially adept one since you already manage the technical issues and have more spare time.

    Until the day comes when our financial data and identification are embedded in a scannable thumb chip (Mr. Tone’s utopia), Clancy needs to carry a purse with a slim wallet that includes her driver’s license and credit cards. You need to organize the family’s financial data, including all passwords, somewhere in computerized form. You also need a filing cabinet.

  5. Sheila Tone says:

    I mean, Will, you can just buy her one. She must have a locker or locking drawer at work. Go to some department store slightly better than Sears (like Macy’s, just for a wider and more dignified selection, not that you’ll spend more than $20.) Look for one of those wallet-on-a-purse string dealies with space for just a few cards, an ID, and some cash and coins. Put it together for her. Keep a list of everything in there somewhere you won’t lose it, so if she loses the pocketbook you’ll know what to cancel immediately.

  6. trumwill says:

    I handle my stuff pretty well, except the passwords. The problem is all of Clancy’s stuff. She likes to do things herself, so it’s taken a lot to get her to hand things over to me. Even then, though, there’s only so much I can do. I can only sometimes activate her credit-cards.

    If it makes you feel any better, I am always on the lookout for suspicious activity on our cards.

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