I got called in for two days this week. Oddly, both seemed to involve special education. Today it’s SE PE, tomorrow it’s just plain special education. I was wondering what was up with that. Apparently, the answer is that they’re training for the Special Olympics.

All of which, perhaps inappropriately, reminds me of the The Onion. First, about the Special Olympics itself:

According to the undercover probe, over the years hundreds and possibly thousands of participating athletes have been declared “winners,” despite losing their respective contests, often by wide margins.

“I don’t think there’s anything ‘winning’ or ‘special’ about finishing in eighth or ninth place,” chief investigator Harlan Brundage said. “Do these kids think they’re winners just because they tried? Just because they gave it their all? Well, let me tell you, trying doesn’t make you a winner. Coming in first does.”

An estimated 15,000 athletes participated in the Special Olympics this year, and, according to Special Olympics awards records, every one of them was declared a “winner.”

The second, in conjunction with a post about demographics serving in the armed forces, Clinton Deploys Very Special Forces:

Clinton said the objective of the mission, dubbed Operation Great Job!, is twofold: to keep pressure on Saddam Hussein to permit the return of U.N. weapons inspectors, and to provide America’s very special forces with a positive, rewarding, esteem-building experience.

“With Operation Great Job!, we send the message loud and clear to Saddam Hussein that his open defiance of the United Nations and international law will not be tolerated,” Clinton said. “We also send the equally important message to our own troops that what’s important is not whether you defeat the enemy, but that you try your best and have fun.”


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2 Responses to Very Special Ed

  1. Mike Hunt says:

    In what may be a coincidence, the chief investigator has the same last name as Avery Brundage, former IOC President. He stripped Jim Thorpe of his medals.

  2. trumwill says:

    Probably not a coincidence.

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